You have my whole heart for my whole life

My Ultimate Life Lesson: You have my whole heart for my whole life

In 3 years my body has changed, my love for my daughter has enveloped me, my soul has reached a place where I have found purpose; A much larger purpose than just my own.

As my sweet Shiloh Marie is inching towards her 3^rd birthday, I can’t help but to lay awake at night and think back to glimpses of her life thus far. The day she was born, the way she laid perfectly on my chest as though my body was built to hold her, the patience she has instilled in me without intention, the pureness I have found since mothering her. What sacred gift such a small little package has given me.

She has inspired me to do and be so much better than before. I learned photography so; I could capture her momentous beauty. I found self acceptance for the first time in my existence.  She taught me, my value far exceeded the money I made or had in savings. She taught me to desire the simple things and ways of life for, that is where the real beauty awaits. I have often caught myself staring at her and thinking "is she really mine?" could it be that the Lord blessed Jared and I with something this beautiful and loving. How was I deserving of such unconditional love? She taught me I was and will forever have it.

Proud Daddy and Mommy

After a seamless pregnancy, her arrival was one for the books. I have just begun to successfully block out the moments of distress surrounding the most important day of my life. Although it was intense, scary, calm yet chaotic and lead up to an emergency C-section due to her heart rate dropping to dangerous levels, all that became an after thought the moment I heard her cry and through my half open eyes from all the sedation and emergency spinal tap, the doctor put her next to my cheek so I could see our new baby girl. No words can express the way my heart, spirit and soul felt that millisecond that I became a Mother, as Jared became her Father.

I was in recovery for several hours due to complications while my husband, closest friends and family were able to see and hold Shiloh in the nursery. After what felt like eternity had past, my Father came to the recovery wing and slipped past the drawn drapes and the nurse’s station to see how his little girl was doing. I had never felt so out of body as I did in that recovery room, needing my newborn daughter’s touch so badly to encourage my body to continue to heal. He cried the moment he laid eyes on me and smiled as he spoke, "She’s beautiful, baby." We both sobbed and I was determined to get to that nursery one way or another. I could not wait another minute after being isolated for 5 hours. My best friend brought me lip gloss (cause that's their job:) and stood by me waiting to flag a Nurse down to beg someone to wheel me up to my newborn baby girl.

The nurse agreed and with extreme ease, I managed to fold myself into the wheelchair and hold back from yelling "faster, faster, faster!!!" to the kind nurse. I always thought my husband would be next to me for the meeting of our daughter but, the complications of my delivery had isolated me from him and my other loved ones. I remember thinking this doesn’t feel right as she wheeled me over every bumpy surface as I braced myself for the pain. I think back now and know I needed to be alone in that very moment.



This is one moment in my life, I can barely talk about. It makes my whole body rush with emotions. The most beautiful emotion I have ever experienced.  She wheeled me in to this room with 40 or so see through bassinets. There were babies of all shapes and sizes, wailing while some lay perfectly silent. I was instantly overwhelmed with the sound and the anticipation of holding Shiloh Marie for the first time. The nurse stopped at the entrance to look at her records to locate which baby was mine. My ears had tuned into a distinct cry coming from the far left corner of the room. I had no idea at this point which one was mine. I cried harder yet purer than I have ever cried in my life. I knew that cry was mine, our baby daughter. She began to wheel me directly over to the exact location of that perfect cry that had called the name of my soul. She double checked my wrist band with the foot band of an hours old baby and handed me my LIFE perfectly swaddled.

That moment my life and perception changed completely. Not one iota of my life is the same before that moment occurred. God gave me purpose, Jared purpose that day he blessed us with the title of parents. For me personally, no job title, amount of money, or other future accomplishment will ever hold a candle to the title of being Shiloh’s Mom. I became whole that day and blessed with the sense of worth only God could bestow.

I sit here with tears flowing down my cheeks and a knot in my throat as my daughter lay peacefully napping in her bed and the only thing I can think of is, Thank you Jesus. Thank you for choosing ME to experience this depth of love in my lifetime and trusting ME to guide this precious child on this journey called life. I am forever grateful. Happy Birthday Shiloh Marie Prince, the day I began to LIVE.


Blessed is an understatement,
Tasha Prince