Now that I am an "official" blogger with one "official" post under my proverbial belt - I must keep the ball rolling. At what point in the day does an occurrence happen that I should say to myself, "Aha, I should post this or leave this be?" The second questions is, "do any of my friends, family or the apparent "lost" blog browser care that much as to what I post. I am not offering product reviews, crafts for sale or free coupons - just a little place to come and read what I have to say for the tiny moment in my day where there is nothing to do but blog.
Well I hope to find the answer to the question but, since I have no followers yet on my infant blog - I may have to be patient. Whether I tell anyone this blog exists or not, remains unseen.
My lesson yesterday, yes I give myself a spiritual lesson or direction for each day I am alive. I reason with myself and try to correct the embedded thought process' that I seemed to have trained myself over the last 30 years of my life. Back to the lesson -- I released every person in or around my life a "hall pass" (it expired today! lol) that allowed me to release them from any expectations that we so easily place on others.
I did not expect nor hope for others to respond, act or feel anything all day. What a blessing it is to allow yourself to let go and let others live expectation free!
For example, my dogs leave a small mountain of white dog hair on my beautiful wood floors every day (they do not even take one day off from their shedding madness). Upon my arrival home from my corporate job with baby Shiloh in tow, the door flings open to find my husband unwinding on the couch deservingly after his busy work day. Normal right, not a big deal? Before I can even put my purse down, there is apart of me that hones in with tunnel vision to the glossy floors covered in dog dander and my skin crawls and leaps out of my skin with disgust. There is nothing that I can do to alleviate this anxiety of "you must clean this immediately before anything else" mentality. With a iota of resentment, I get to the daunting yet daily task of sweeping and mopping the floors. One might say, I am OCD - I say, Maybe or just not a fan of allergy causing dander. Regardless, many thoughts cross my mind as I clean..Why does this not bother my cool as a cuke husband? Does he not see it or does he just choose to ignore it?
Hmm...I think it is a combination - but that is not the point here - the point is I need to redirect my thoughts.
Yesterday, I taught myself a valuable lesson - its dirt not disease!
Let the dog hair go and the expectation of wanting my husband to read my mind and sweep it up before I walk in the door. Accept he is not a mind reader but a man who doesn't care if his wood floors shine in the sunlight. I accept that there will be dog hair waiting on me everyday and every morning as long as I am a pet owner. More importantly, I love the dogs that shed and the ting of resentment I feel for my hubby everytime he doesn't help out around the house will eventually add up to a larger mountain than the dog hair will ever grow to be. So, no mop or dog hair will put a wedge in my daily communication with my husband again! I release the trained thoughts out into the universe - they no longer live here!
Today's lesson was a piggy back lesson of yesterday's - tomorrow brings a whole new hurdle to cross.
Expectation Free,
Me
The paradox of insular language
2 years ago
2 comments:
Tasha, I think that when you began the rant about the dog dander is when the post began to really hit home, just like with other mothers and wives. I caught myself last night scrubbing the floors and toilet in the bathroom with a bottle of bleach by my side in a furry, cursing my poor hubby the entire time!! haha. I understand your pain and how we all need to take a deep breath and forget about it ... for a minute and give hugs instead of orders :) Good job.
Thanks Ashley! I love that you said "give hugs instead of orders," ain't that the truth!
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