40 Days to a Better Understanding of Me...both Physically and Mentally.

Give me 40 days and a Yoga Mat and I will tell you what happens!

40 is a mystical number signifying some sort of trial/testing/transition period and spiritual growth. It is mentioned 140 times in the Bible and is noted as a significant number in many other Religions around the World. (To read more http://ecclesia.org/truth/40.html)

Yogic science teaches that it takes 40 days to create or change a habit. A 40-day commitment to change can provide the shift needed to develop a healthy habit or to drop a destructive habit. A first step in experiencing the challenge and the satisfaction of lasting change is to commit to 40 consecutive days of yoga practice.

Orlando Power Yoga  offers a special for 40 days unlimited Yoga for $40.00 - a dollar a day for a powerful journey for both Mind and Body.

So, here I stand soaking wet from my scalp to the tiny pores on the tips of my toes, drenched like never before in the aftermath of Day ONE.  I slipped in right at 9:45am this morning and quietly rolled my mat out next to my friend Sarah who secured us a place in the very back. She greeted me with a smile and a look of here we go....

Power Yoga is also called Hot Yoga for a reason....it is hotter than the Sahara in there and the hot air slaps your face from the very second you walk in. The room temperature has been set to the high 80's and mixed with the Hot Florida sun...I begin to sweat before the powerhouse of a teacher has even spoken. Her arms are sculpted along with every inch of her petite frame. She exudes strength and positive energy. She glides through the room acknowledging her students and welcomes us.

We begin in Child’s Pose and her voice is the calm before the work begins. The work to stay physically balanced, body aligned and my breath steady and engaged. I listen to her voice obediently anticipating the next contortion my body will be guided into. 3 minutes have passed and there is a puddle surrounding my rooted palms and a steady stream of perspiration is dripping from my forehead that is peering backwards through the V in my legs. I breathe in deep and release last nights stale air, mouth closed (similar to fogging a mirror but lips closed) attempting to allow my Ujjai breath to guide me where it is, I am suppose to be in that very moment.

The beauty of Yoga is for 80 minutes in today’s case, I devoted myself to me. No obligations, expectations, or intentions other than flow with it. Let the sweat detoxify the toxins, my Mind bounce from thought to thought and back to a calm place of nothingness, my arms hold my body weight for just long enough that my violently shaking muscles don't buckle, my legs rooted to the Earth soaking the energy from the soil seeping through the hard wood floor into my heels, reminding me of my own strength. My Soul speaking soft Thank You’s for the effort I am making in better myself today. Just as quickly I am guided back to a Triangle pose, arms reached to the ceiling opening my rib cage with a slight twist at the waist. The sweat has consumed me at this point. The room is thick with body heat and moisture. My teal cotton shorts are deep turquoise and are one with my legs. My tank top is heavy. I steal a quick scan of the room and note we are all the same, swimming in the perspiration. We are equally detoxifying.

I practice with my eyes closed most of the time, desperately trying to concentrate on holding the pose and reminding myself second by second to Breathe. The breath keeps me stable, right side up or at times arched backwards for just a second longer....I push through the thought of taking a break.

The class takes us upwards, downwards, sideways and lastly, legs up and over our heads tight to our ears. Her voice guides us on our backs and arms and legs opened lying effortless to our sides. We lay still. Not a sound can be heard. Our Minds are allowed this moment of silence to rest. The thoughts slowly enter as though they opened a small door right above my right ear and entered cautiously. I acknowledge them and send them to the appropriate place. Some get sent straight out the door across the hall and some I alllow to gather. Thoughts of my daughter, the chores, bills (sent across the hall....), my marriage, the words I have spoken or those I need too, Enter. The thoughts swirl around in this place upstairs and then I clear them out. I focus on blackness. The thoughts knock on the door and I do not answer. My eyes gaze upward although they are closed. What are they looking for, I asked myself? Time has passed slowly here in this state. My breaths are shallow and slowed. My body is dead weight just long enough.

The Teacher's voice gently brings us back to awareness..she speaks, "You are right where you need to be in this very moment?" I needed that validation, we all need that validation. That permission to be Present. Claim it people!

For the next 40 days, I am claiming it and hoping the 40 days will retrain my habitual thinking to believe it and make it a constant way of life. I am softly hoping, intentionless to Change into whatever it is I need to be for the Moments ahead.

Day One was a great one! I look forward to this Journey I have embarked on. One day at a Time, One pose per second, Acknowledging One thought per instance. Being Me in the Moment.

Namaste

You have my whole heart for my whole life

My Ultimate Life Lesson: You have my whole heart for my whole life

In 3 years my body has changed, my love for my daughter has enveloped me, my soul has reached a place where I have found purpose; A much larger purpose than just my own.

As my sweet Shiloh Marie is inching towards her 3^rd birthday, I can’t help but to lay awake at night and think back to glimpses of her life thus far. The day she was born, the way she laid perfectly on my chest as though my body was built to hold her, the patience she has instilled in me without intention, the pureness I have found since mothering her. What sacred gift such a small little package has given me.

She has inspired me to do and be so much better than before. I learned photography so; I could capture her momentous beauty. I found self acceptance for the first time in my existence.  She taught me, my value far exceeded the money I made or had in savings. She taught me to desire the simple things and ways of life for, that is where the real beauty awaits. I have often caught myself staring at her and thinking "is she really mine?" could it be that the Lord blessed Jared and I with something this beautiful and loving. How was I deserving of such unconditional love? She taught me I was and will forever have it.

Proud Daddy and Mommy

After a seamless pregnancy, her arrival was one for the books. I have just begun to successfully block out the moments of distress surrounding the most important day of my life. Although it was intense, scary, calm yet chaotic and lead up to an emergency C-section due to her heart rate dropping to dangerous levels, all that became an after thought the moment I heard her cry and through my half open eyes from all the sedation and emergency spinal tap, the doctor put her next to my cheek so I could see our new baby girl. No words can express the way my heart, spirit and soul felt that millisecond that I became a Mother, as Jared became her Father.

I was in recovery for several hours due to complications while my husband, closest friends and family were able to see and hold Shiloh in the nursery. After what felt like eternity had past, my Father came to the recovery wing and slipped past the drawn drapes and the nurse’s station to see how his little girl was doing. I had never felt so out of body as I did in that recovery room, needing my newborn daughter’s touch so badly to encourage my body to continue to heal. He cried the moment he laid eyes on me and smiled as he spoke, "She’s beautiful, baby." We both sobbed and I was determined to get to that nursery one way or another. I could not wait another minute after being isolated for 5 hours. My best friend brought me lip gloss (cause that's their job:) and stood by me waiting to flag a Nurse down to beg someone to wheel me up to my newborn baby girl.

The nurse agreed and with extreme ease, I managed to fold myself into the wheelchair and hold back from yelling "faster, faster, faster!!!" to the kind nurse. I always thought my husband would be next to me for the meeting of our daughter but, the complications of my delivery had isolated me from him and my other loved ones. I remember thinking this doesn’t feel right as she wheeled me over every bumpy surface as I braced myself for the pain. I think back now and know I needed to be alone in that very moment.



This is one moment in my life, I can barely talk about. It makes my whole body rush with emotions. The most beautiful emotion I have ever experienced.  She wheeled me in to this room with 40 or so see through bassinets. There were babies of all shapes and sizes, wailing while some lay perfectly silent. I was instantly overwhelmed with the sound and the anticipation of holding Shiloh Marie for the first time. The nurse stopped at the entrance to look at her records to locate which baby was mine. My ears had tuned into a distinct cry coming from the far left corner of the room. I had no idea at this point which one was mine. I cried harder yet purer than I have ever cried in my life. I knew that cry was mine, our baby daughter. She began to wheel me directly over to the exact location of that perfect cry that had called the name of my soul. She double checked my wrist band with the foot band of an hours old baby and handed me my LIFE perfectly swaddled.

That moment my life and perception changed completely. Not one iota of my life is the same before that moment occurred. God gave me purpose, Jared purpose that day he blessed us with the title of parents. For me personally, no job title, amount of money, or other future accomplishment will ever hold a candle to the title of being Shiloh’s Mom. I became whole that day and blessed with the sense of worth only God could bestow.

I sit here with tears flowing down my cheeks and a knot in my throat as my daughter lay peacefully napping in her bed and the only thing I can think of is, Thank you Jesus. Thank you for choosing ME to experience this depth of love in my lifetime and trusting ME to guide this precious child on this journey called life. I am forever grateful. Happy Birthday Shiloh Marie Prince, the day I began to LIVE.


Blessed is an understatement,
Tasha Prince

Patience my Friend

Daily Lesson:

"This" - this moment, this thought,

this conversation, this breath, this vary instance, BE.

Today's lesson was taught to me over a crispy chicken salad, tennis court side with an old pal. It had been a while since we had spoken and this morning we spent it together - catching up, canoodling her new beautiful baby boy, a walk, enjoying lunch court side in the warm Florida sun.

We spent a few minutes debriefing one another, touching on all the hot topics in our life: new babies, home decor, parents, photography, her job, mine, when I shared with her my desire to hone in on what "it" is I was made for - my purpose, my calling, my path to success if you will.

I wanted her input since she seems to have found her place in the world.

She explained after a year long stint of daily early morning meditation at the local ashram, the one thing that repeatedly resonated with her was a single word, "this."

She interpreted it to mean be in "this" very moment, be present in the conversation you are having, focus on the task at hand, be patient, sit in the moment you are in and bask in its entirety. I love that or should I say "this!" I asked and received a fragile reminder that "this" is right where I am supposed to be. As long as my heart is in the right place and my best foot is always forward, I believe wholeheartedly it will lead me down my chosen path. I will remind myself daily, patience my friend.

Toe Shoes are Worn Out

Daily Lesson:

Sometimes a Break in the Routine is a great idea. Clear the slate and take a step back to re-analyze before moving forward. Find your place in the moment.

Even as a 30 year old woman, I find I am still being told what to do. How is it so, that we spend our whole childhood being told exactly what to do and when - only to become an adult and still have that never ending gloomy cloud of "you should or need to do this" hanging over our adult asses. I find myself riddled and slightly annoyed. I need some breathing room - some time to ponder what I enjoy and what I am being told to enjoy.
What is it that I am happy most doing? I am not going A-wall or contemplating Anarchy but, just a little tired of the expectations that are held over my head. Don’t they know, expectations only lead to disappointment? I am giving myself permission to be free of others expectations and/or judgments. This is Me in raw form attempting to transition to be 100% authentic. Many think they are being their true self 24 hours a day but, I find that rare and hard to believe at this age anyway. I think the beauty in aging is the peace of mind that accompanies it. Having true established thoughts.
Many times I put others first, half heartily just to make them smile when inside I am straight faced. That does nobody any good. No more tippee-toeing around for me. My toe shoes are worn out. This is a positive change, others may see it differently but it is in my best interest for once.

Please Do Not Disturb, I am Mind Mapping - Thank You!

Daily Lesson:

There is nothing that important to talk about all day long. Sit with the silence & learn your daily blessings!

Have you ever just sat and vowed to be silent? You  must try it! There is a lot that can go on in a silent moment. Wishful thinking, mindful decision making, intuitive insight along with little whispers of blessings in your minds voice. If this is sounding like mumbo jumbo so far, you have confirmed that you have not sat in true silence, some call it meditation - I call it being quiet for a long enough time frame to hear yourself clearly. What are you trying to get across?

Ever since Shiloh was little a nap is just as important to her as it is for me. I take this time roughly two hours a day to do my odd jobs around the house, emails, cook, plan for the week, start dinner etc. The coolest part of that time, is that it is all spent in silence. I usually do not answer the phone during this time and just spend it with myself in silence listening to any thought or direction my mind wants to take me in. I have also heard referred to as Mind Mapping. Following your mindful trail of discovery.
This is where new direction, fresh ideas, creativity, healing and insight comes from. During this 2 hour silence session is where I shape my next move in life. Then I spend all the other time in the day building on the message(s) I received.

Many of you know me as a bubbly energetic whirlwind but I have an extreme quiet side as well.

Quiet time or Silence is one thing, but how do you spend your quiet time? Are you mindfully available to receive messages from yourself or spiritual direction? You do not have to be enlightened to receive important-sometimes path altering messages. Are you a thought-blocker? They are usually only heard while in the presence of silence. Are you allowing those messages and thoughts to be heard?
I hope I haven't lost ya with today's post but, I am trying to get the importance of mindful silence.

Give it a try. Sit and try to unclutter your mind long enough to listen, really listen. It may help to close your eyes, but eventually you can cook a meal and clean up all while listening. It is amazing what pops up. Try at the same time to push the intercepting "junk" thoughts to the side until they subside. Let your day thus far seise just for a moment. Listen to how the rest of your day wants to continue.
The saying "Ignorance is Bliss" is another way of describing a non-meditative mind. What I mean by that is, if you don't listen to what your Mind is really saying, its as though it doesn't matter. Just like anything else you don't pay attention too - it stops trying to gain your interest. Engage your mind people - I am not talking about a crossword or a Suduko session.

What if you went your whole life listening only to the sub-surface of your thinking. The direct thoughts that tell you right or left, yes or no, unhappy or happy and so forth. What if you completely ignore the directional messages the mindful thoughts that shape who "you" are. For instance, maybe you are in a position to make a challenging decision in your life. Have you asked yourself what to do? If so, did you wait for the answer long enough to hear it? Or did you call every friend, family member and co-worker to yak about the pros & cons? All that did, was cloud your mind with their thoughts - making it that much harder to hear your own untainted rationale. Before all others, sit with yourself and get the answers. If you don't know, just be patient and try asking yourself in a different tone. Be ready to listen and open to the message, whether your going to like the answer is a whole 'nother blog.

The deep thinking is where its at people.
Give your mouth a rest and force your inner voice to be heard.
Check this Mind Map out as an example how to side track your everyday thoughts to focus on the real prize (http://www.mindmapinspiration.com/meditation-visualization/)

Quiet as a Cucumber,
Tasha

Peace Out USA --> Fiji Bound!

Daily Question:Would you accept $1,000,000 to leave the country and never set foot in it again?

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(If your just tuning in - this is question #9 of The Book of Questions

written by Gregory Stock, PH.D)

I skipped question 7 & 8,  just because I can. I vowed to go question to question but, some are just not worth elaborating on (sorry Gregory!) I haven't written in a while because I sort of lost some steam with this undertaking. It sort of takes the fun out of blogging if you vow to do it. I have decided to blog as I may and answer the questions as I feel inclined to in hopes of putting the thrill back in to my wee little blog. On to the answer...

YES, without a doubt! Not a question about it. My reasoning is that I could afford to take my family with me. That is all that matters in my world, my family and my close knit friends. I could afford to take them with me to Fiji, where else?  I know $1 million bucks isn't a whole lot and it goes fast but not as fast where the simple life is the only way of life. I would let my parents retire and I would work teaching English or working at the Resorts in neighboring areas. Jared would hypothetically work as a fisherman and would build water huts.

This would be our water front neighborhood - perfection!

I would miss the amenities of the U.S but would be glad to be free of the rat race we call life. Would love nothing more than to sell all my possessions and rebuild a new life in Fiji, Bora Bora or Tahiti.

What a peaceful place to raise children. In a natural most spectacular setting where kids are free of the electronically plugged in society. Active lifestyles filled with survival techniques and tradition.

I would trade in this over stuffed lake house for a grass hut and a working boat in the islands any day. Sign me up! I will at some point spend a portion of my life in a remote setting getting back to nature and the basics. When, not sure but know 100% it is in my future.

Peace Out U.S - Fiji Bound,

Tasha

Baby Swap would Break my Heart.

Daily Question:

You discover your wonderful 1 year old child is, because of a mix up at the hospital, not yours. Would you want to exchange the child to try to correct the mistake?

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(If your just tuning in - this is question #6 of The Book of Questions

written by Gregory Stock, PH.D)

 

This question is by far the hardest question ytd. Just thinking about this hypothetical situation is making me nauseated. As a Mother of a 2 year old, this question is disturbing.

I will try to answer it the best I can but, I wouldn't wish this on anyone although I am sure it has happened more times than not.

 

I asked my husband this question and he was quick to answer Yes, correct the mistake and get our biological baby back and continue on with our life. I say, Yes also but with severe reservations. I have nurtured, loved and will always love the child that was "ours" for the first year of its life. I can't fathom packing his/hers favorite blanket and teddy bear and loading up as a family in the car to head back to the hospital to make the swap.  Biological or not, that is my child - to mix up children is unacceptable! I would be devastated but, would have a glimmer of hope knowing that our other child is in the wrong home and wanting to reunite with my other baby.

A loss of one - to gain what was meant to be. What if the family that was receiving back their biological child that I had raised thus far was not an ideal family? How could I knowingly place a child into a home that was unsafe, less loving or just not good enough?

I couldn't live with myself either way. The glass could be half full for a moment, and the other family would be ideal and just as loving yada yada yada - perfect or not, the separation of a family is never easy.

I would hope to stay in touch with that family and child and watch that baby grow. I would be blessed to have my biological child back home with us but, would always hold that child near to my heart. I would try to find the beauty in the mayhem and pray to get me through it.

 

Side note * I would sue the living shit out of the hospital and give the proceeds 50/50 to both children to pay for college. I would make the person who was responsible make a public apology and outline a  program for their department to ensure that this would never happen again. I would make it my personal mission to make the public aware of the risks and precautions that parents can take to protect this injustice from occurring.

 

Tasha

 

 

1% versus 99%

Daily Question:

If a new medicine were developed that would cure arthritis but cause a fatal reaction in 1% of those who took it, would you want it to be released to the public?

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(If your just tuning in - this is question #5 of The Book of Questions

written by Gregory Stock, PH.D)

Well I think it is important to mention that arthritis is not a condition to be taken lightly. It may seem to some that arthritis can be uncomfortable and causes aches & pains but, not life threatening. It can be and has taken the life of my bestfriends mother, Teresa at a young age.

I would never wish this decision to be one I must choose but, for the sake of answering all questions - I say yes.

Yes, I would release it even if it meant taking the life of 1% of the patients. My reasoning is that 99% would be spared a lifetime of pain and debilitating ailments and potentially their lives. Under one condition would I release this medicine to the public, that all 100% of participants knew that 1% of the patients would not be on the surviving end of this deal. As harsh as that sounds, 1% would most likely lose the battle on their own and 99% would be spared.

I often wonder, if this question is just hypothetical or if the "cure" to arthritis and other life threatening diseases have in fact been found. I do believe the money is in the medicine and not in the cure. As sad as that is, I do believe there are cure alls to the cancers and other terminal diseases. What if we were given the cure. What would that do to natural selection and the population count. If in fact the cure(s) do exists, are there stipulations such as this proposed question: Cancer will be cured but, x% will not survive.

Would we want to play God and pick in choose which percentage survives or dies?

Tasha